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Thread: Lesson horror stories

  1. #21

    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    Quote Originally Posted by sharpinthefang View Post
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  3. #23
    chill yo coop52's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    Quote Originally Posted by weepinbell View Post
    Jesus

    Yeah I guess I meant just general mishaps in class and not just 'my kids just stared at me blankly for 10 min' I know that's to be expected. I like hearing about the bad stuff... like generally I really love kids but they also kinda suck, going to another country won't change that. Also hey all that bad stuff clearly makes for some good stories anyway lol. Builds character maybe? Haha
    You generally won't get fail stories beyond "kids sat and stared at me for the whole time" in regular classes, unless you get a school in a bad area. Most of my really out there stories are from special needs, but I had kids in regular classes break windows and cry and whatever, just not during class time.

    My most exciting story involved the Japanese equivalent of the SWAT team coming to the school to get a kid. Special needs kid didn't want to go to class and decided judo throwing his homeroom teacher, causing the poor dude to have to wear a neck brace for a while, was the best way to express his feelings. 5 or 6 SWAT dudes showed up and ran through the school looking for this kid while the teachers kept the other kids in their classrooms. This particular school isn't even that bad of a school. A friend of mine who works in Osaka talked about his kids getting into fist fights and punching teachers on a regular basis, including on parents' days.

  4. #24
    Billy Big Bollocks Ini's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    In everyones favorite prefecture a group tore the small blackboard off the back wall of their 3rd floor classroom and threw it through the window, while it was shut, to the ground below.....
    Great men of action never mind on occasion being ridiculous; in a sense it is part of their job.

  5. #25
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    Probably when one kid kicked a teacher in the balls. He's quite special, though and has anger issues.

  6. #26

    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    I have this one class in my Thursday school. I know every day is going to be a painful 45 minutes before lunch, because they're dead in the water. They don't want to participate and that's fine, I generally just go around to the kids who do want to participate.

    But they go beyond not wanting to do anything. Every single class I know that one kid is going to start crying. I know one kid is going to get THROWN out of class by the teacher. I do mean picked up and forcefully shoved out of the room. Two kids are going to be fighting about something, and that usually will end up with more crying students. One kid is going to sit next to the broom closet in a fetal position, and ignore every redirection offered by the teacher.

    And while I'm trying to keep the rest of the kids from staring at the mayhem, I'm also trying to do the lesson. But they don't understand, even when I use Japanese to explain the activity, and even the teacher who I planned this lesson with a week before looks at me when I ask for help explaining like "bitch, you're nuts, I have no clue what's going on."

    And it's right before lunch. I can't describe how little I want to be in that class room.

  7. #27
    Senior Member matt360's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    I'm pretty sure I've told this story here before, but this happened several years ago at a special needs visit school. On this particular day there were university student volunteers in the classroom along with the regular teachers, and about 30 tards. At the beginning of every class I have to sing the hello song, and go from student to student and shake each students' hand. I get to this one particularly gnarly-looking special kid and start singing, "Hellooooo, hellooooo, hello how are you?" and waving my hands like a jackass, only to see this wave of embarrassment come over him. It's almost like I can see him diminish as a person. He starts shaking his head wildly and points to his visitor pass on his chest. "Oh fuck!" I thought. He wasn't a tard at all, he was just a really fucking ugly college kid. The lesson itself was actually pretty good. But it was awkward as hell after that and I felt like an asshole. I tried to play it cool, but there was no going back after that. In the end I think I did him a favor though.

  8. #28
    The Sun's Bird God..what? Zolrak 22's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    Quote Originally Posted by matt360 View Post
    I'm pretty sure I've told this story here before,
    Made me chuckle, 8/10 or 9/10.

  9. #29

    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    Quote Originally Posted by matt360 View Post
    I'm pretty sure I've told this story here before, but this happened several years ago at a special needs visit school. On this particular day there were university student volunteers in the classroom along with the regular teachers, and about 30 tards. At the beginning of every class I have to sing the hello song, and go from student to student and shake each students' hand. I get to this one particularly gnarly-looking special kid and start singing, "Hellooooo, hellooooo, hello how are you?" and waving my hands like a jackass, only to see this wave of embarrassment come over him. It's almost like I can see him diminish as a person. He starts shaking his head wildly and points to his visitor pass on his chest. "Oh fuck!" I thought. He wasn't a tard at all, he was just a really fucking ugly college kid. The lesson itself was actually pretty good. But it was awkward as hell after that and I felt like an asshole. I tried to play it cool, but there was no going back after that. In the end I think I did him a favor though.
    LOL.

    In retrospect you probably should have faked like you were doing some "class involvement" schtick and gone round all the uni kids. Then they'd have been like "ohohoho bery funny american joku", but yeah I'd have probably frozen too.

  10. #30
    Senior Member matt360's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    Quote Originally Posted by Jiggit View Post
    LOL.

    In retrospect you probably should have faked like you were doing some "class involvement" schtick and gone round all the uni kids. Then they'd have been like "ohohoho bery funny american joku", but yeah I'd have probably frozen too.
    Yeah, as soon as the class was over I spent some time thinking about what I should have done. And that guy will never forget the day he was mistaken for a special needs child. But in fairness it was his own fault. Uni-brow, stained teeth, a dopey, aloof kind of persona, and that flaky skin ailment that seems to plague lots of Japanese people. He was in pretty bad shape.

  11. #31
    The Sun's Bird God..what? Zolrak 22's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    You convinced me, it's 9/10.

  12. #32
    Crustacean Sensation Ebi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lesson horror stories

    I think we've all had lessons that "flopped" for one reason or another. The worst that I recall was just a few months or so into my first year.

    When I was a bright-eyed newbie, I taught two days a week at my local elementary school. I really like elementary visits now, but honestly the beginning was pretty tough. The previous ALT told me nothing and left no materials or lesson plans of any kind. I later came to realize that he didn't really do lesson plans. I guess he mostly just played random games and then played the guitar.

    Since I had nothing else to go off of, I used the elementary "textbook" (Eigo Noto) and built my lessons around that. I worked really hard to make lessons cohesive and smooth and brought my own materials to fill the gaps. It was apparently a big change for the school since I kept getting comments saying, "Wow, you're actually a teacher!"

    Unfortunately, I let my ego get the best of me. One day I decided I wasn't going to do massive planning like usual and just do a game and wing the rest. I felt like I was familiar enough with the pattern by that point and I assumed my school had flashcards lying around since I found a big box in storage earlier. Well... there were no flash cards for that lesson and my game finished unexpectedly early. So I decided to start introducing the next lesson's vocab to fill the time, only to realize that I didn't know all of the words in Japanese. So without flash cards, without Japanese to fall back on, and in my class with a Home Room Teacher who was always really uncooperative/completely disinterested in English... everything just fell apart. Luckily there were only a few minutes left so class was quickly over. But I heard kids whispering "wakaranai..." back and forth and I knew that I failed hard.

    But at least I learned a lot from my mistakes and I took steps to prevent any of my lessons thereafter from being so abysmally bad. I don't have to write out my lesson plans in detail anymore, but I still do the same mental processes to make sure transitions are smooth and I'm constantly checking student comprehension. And I never completely fly by the seat of my pants unless I'm forced to do so.
    Last edited by Ebi; April 18th, 2015 at 12:48.

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